Words like empathy and compassion always resonated with me yet, in my personal relationships, I kept up an emotional guard. The closer the relationship, the higher the metaphoric wall. That is, until I got married. Then I built different kinds of walls, lower but more numerous, and often camouflaged… even from myself. To share from the heart means I can continue my practice of tearing down those walls and opening up to share vast emotional reserves.
Almost anybody can learn to think or believe or know, but not a single human being can be taught to feel. Why? Because whenever you think or you believe or you know, you’re a lot of other people: but the moment you feel, you’re nobody-but-yourself. ee cummings
I do appreciate the irony of leaving Portland, Oregon for Kansas City, Missouri in order to connect to my new-age, metaphysical, spiritual-smorgasbord potential. I realize that relinquishing defines my year in the Broken Heartland: surrendering my career, my intellectual control, my emotional rigidity, my financial security, my heart (which, when it was returned to me, was in pieces), my cat (to live next door for a year), and my spiritual skepticism.
As I was sitting on the porch here in KC thinking about the relationships around me I was also thinking about the lessons gleaned from my marriage and subsequent divorce. In other words, I was thinking about relationships of the romantic, platonic, friendship, professional, tangental, etc. variety. I now offer up, for your consideration, those thoughts… which, admittedly, are largely in the context of romantic love though the lessons are applicable to all relationships.
My name is Fortuna and I am presently in the body of a black cat. I can best be described by referring to the human who caters to my every whim; his name is Steve.
For a while I was afraid that he somehow thought I couldn’t understand English. I pitied his lack of intuition. Then he seemed to get it though we’ve since both agreed that I will continue to pretend that I don’t understand him. He is okay with this, which is good, as he has no choice.