You are now entering the realm shared by the curious and the zealotry, the seekers and the close-minded, the believers and the fanatics, the prophet and the heretic… the realm of spirituality. I hope you can stay afloat. Fortunately for me, my family taught me how to swim.
See, I’ve had to finally admit that I am a spiritual person on a spiritual path and these musings are the first step I see to sharing that journey. But don’t worry too much; I’m still a smart-ass, sarcastic ‘cheeky fellow’ so I’m sure that this conversation won’t get too deep… or rather, too out there… or in there.
After all, I did find god in a septic tank; that’s quite the irreverent start.
As I stand in the shadows of truly great thinkers, visionaries, and, yes, divine being, I am initially a bit afraid to continue. But it is fear that I resist (no fear-based decision making for me) and I ultimately must understand that trepidation only exists if I think that I am trying to espouse The Truth.
I’m not. At all. In any way, shape, or form.
Instead, I’m embracing my truth and the day we are truly afraid to tell our truth is the day we give up all our power. Talking about such a loaded topic as spirituality is frightening at the onset until one remembers that we can be accepting and tolerant in all facets of our life… if we choose to be.
Deeper Than Words
I am also not going to worry that you get turned off by the language I use. You and I speak a common language and we use that language to convey levels of complexity that are so far beyond words. It is like saying a nightlight is a fair representation of the sun. Our language comes down through the ages ladened with meaning, implication, bias, and objectivity. I say Jesus Christ and you call me a bible thumper. I say “the abundant Divine Spirit” and you tell me to go hug a tree.
Faith, religion, spirituality, sin, benediction, prayer, meditation, energy bodies, chakras, karma, dharma, Krishna, Holy Spirit, Buddha, Allah, prophesy… all carry the weight of history (an often grim backstory) on their shoulders and make the entire conversation around whatever-the-hell-you-want-to-call-that-which-is-bigger-and-more-complex-than-we one where we can categorize, judge, and dismiss.
My truth regarding words is this: they mean what they mean in the moment and they mean what they mean because it is the speaker or writer who gives them meaning. There is an entirely popular (and, in my truth, believable) notion that ‘all we have is now’. We don’t have the past and we sure don’t have the future. This reminds me of the Buddhist notion that you don’t exist beyond a chronology of ‘present moments’ that you have put together to call ‘your past’ which shapes ‘who you are’. What would happen if that chronology of moments were to be wiped from your mind? What would happen to you and your story? Who would you be? Why not ask an amnesiac or someone with Alzheimer’s.
So if, like most, you believe that all we have is now, then believe that all I am writing is also now and nothing more. I’m going to use a phrase like “The Divine” and you are welcome to insert anything in place of that phrase (like God, Buddha, Krishna, Avatars, Science, Capitalism, or ‘there is no such thing as Divine you jackass’), or an expression like “awakening” and you’re welcome to insert ‘filled with the holy spirit’, ‘present’, ‘higher consciousness’, or ‘please hit the snooze button’.
I’m not espousing your truth after all. That is your own story to tell.
I never bought into anything spiritual on a deep level until I went to Mexico with my youth group. I was ‘forced’ to go to youth group by my mom… and it was on this trip to Mexico that I found god. While the story is referred to as ‘The Ditch Story’, I actually found god in a hole meant for a septic tank. Fortunately we were digging the hole so it was not in use when I ‘found’ her and let her into my heart. Finding god in the bottom of a ten-foot deep shitter has an irreverent ring to it and my truth involves a god with a sense of humor. I wish it was a trait cultivated in more of her followers.
I told the universe that I would confess to the world that I am on a spiritual journey. I’m waking up to a reality that is very different than the one I used to perceive. In this reality, there is no more ego to get in the way of living; I am constantly striving to get out of my own way. In this reality, there are no grudges, hurt feelings, and linger angers. How can there be when we are nothing more than a reflection of one another or, to get knee deep in spiritual jargon, infused with the same divine spirit. The true joy in life comes from connectedness and not the intellectualized isolation that we celebrate in the west.